2 Bullet points - How to Stay Calm and in Control During Stressful Situations

1. Activate Your "Inner Witness" — The Power of Detached Observation

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When stress hits, our brains often shift into fight-or-flight mode, causing us to react impulsively or emotionally. One technique to combat this is to activate your "inner witness." This is essentially a mental shift that allows you to step back from the immediate emotional experience and observe it as if you're a third party watching yourself in the situation.

To do this:

• Mentally detach from the stressor. Instead of being "in" the problem, picture yourself as an observer in the room, watching your own reactions.
• Ask yourself: What am I feeling right now? Why am I reacting this way? This brings an element of curiosity into the stress, which can prevent emotional overwhelm.
• Imagine yourself narrating the scene in third person. "Alex is feeling frustrated right now because of the unexpected change in plans. He’s noticing his pulse quicken, but he is choosing to breathe deeply and stay centered."

This shift in perspective creates space between you and the emotional charge of the situation , allowing you to regain control over your actions. It may sound a little odd at first, but it's a remarkably effective way to remain grounded when everything around you feels chaotic.

2. Use the "Tonic Pause" — A Tiny, Intentional Breath Break

In moments of intense stress, taking a moment to pause is more powerful than you might think. But not just any pause—this is called the "tonic pause." It’s a specific, intentional break that involves using a single breath to reset your nervous system.

How to practice the tonic pause:

• Pause for 1-2 seconds before reacting to a stressful trigger. This pause is not about holding your breath but about creating a tiny space where you consciously choose how to respond.
• As you pause, take a deep, slow breath in through your nose , hold for a moment, and then exhale smoothly. It’s not about deep breathing for relaxation, but simply about providing enough time for your body and mind to recalibrate .
• Visualize this breath as a reset button: with each exhale, release tension and the urge to react immediately.

This simple technique is surprisingly potent because it interrupts the automatic stress response and gives you a moment to act from a place of control, rather than reaction. Even just one well-timed pause can completely shift the trajectory of how a stressful situation unfolds.

When I'm tired, feeling low,
 I dig deep, let my power grow.
 Exhausted, yes, but still I rise,
 Strength within me, no disguise.